When we do something wrong the most important thing to do is acknowledge it. Often we don't. We are afraid the other person’s reaction will hurt us. Ultimately we want to be absolved of our acts of hurt. We want to be acknowledged in return. We want to know that our message has been received and we are worthy of love from the ones we care about. We fear the pain of losing that person we love. We fear the pain of guilt for causing our own loss.
Some times our own self esteem prevents us from acknowledging our offense toward another person. Even though we acknowledge our hurtful behavior in our own hearts and minds we decide that the offense was so great that the one that was hurt could never forgive or trust us. We cannot imagine that the other person could to love us and we accept that. We decide without acknowledging the wrong that we deserve to be removed from that person’s life. We abandon the relationship because that is what we decide we deserve. We decide we are not worthy.
Most often the people we love sincerely do not know they have caused us pain. We believe if they truly knew and loved us that certainly they would already know that they have hurt us. Because each of us is such an intricate and complex individual, what causes one person hurt does not always cause the same hurt in another. When we are hurting acknowledgement is important. It is difficult to confront another person and tell them you have been hurt by their actions.
When we have made our pain known and it is not acknowledged the pain of the original offense is worse. We have opened our heart and shared our pain. We have shown a vulnerable area to a person we care for. We expect that to be acknowledged. We expect the other person cares for us just as we do for them. We expect them to be willing to be equally vulnerable. When we fail to acknowledge a hurt we cause in another person that person could believe we simply do not care. They feel that their hurt and pain is unimportant to us. They feel like we do not love them back.
Even God asks us to acknowledge our wrongs. He does not even expect that there won’t be any. His entire design includes provisions for the times we fail. God forgives freely but the only thing He requires is acknowledgment of our wrongs.
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1John 1:9
He does not even remember we were once unclean. He resumes His love for us the second we have acknowledged our wrongs against Him. Human beings are not God and are not completely capable of forgetting offenses. God does not bring offense against us therefore He has no need to ever remember offenses. He does not have to be concerned with causing them again. As humans it is not always wrong to remember our offensive behavior against others only so we do not repeat them again. What is wrong is continuing to hold onto offenses we have committed or others have committed against us once they have been acknowledged. Any acknowledged offenses are useless and serve no purpose.
